


relief

by wrnkledtime



Series: to the end of the world [4]
Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: F/M, Fluffy Angst, angsty fluff, captain swan reunion, cs ff, hoo boy, idk how to write anything else as of late, ouat 5x14, whatever you wanna call it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-29
Updated: 2016-03-29
Packaged: 2018-05-29 22:35:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,134
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6396727
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wrnkledtime/pseuds/wrnkledtime
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>relief - they've never felt so much of it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	relief

_Relief._ She’s never felt so much of it. Her entire life she’s gained and then she’s lost. She’s hoped for and then she’s left disappointed. She’s swallowed her fear and hasn’t gone down without a fight. She’s punched and kicked and screamed to have things go her way. There have been times where she’s come out victorious, of course there have, but there’s never been a time like this, like this very moment with her chin squashed heavily against the crook of his shoulder, his cheek rested lightly against her own, and her eyes stinging with the onslaught of tears that are threatening to break loose, where she’s felt this kind of relief.

She wants to drown in it - feel so much of it to that there won’t be another time where she has to feel this much of this kind of relief ever again, because she doesn’t think she can handle it. She knows she can’t.

Her hair falls into her eyes as she shifts against him and he grunts lowly as his body jostles. An apology rushes to her lips before it fades away just as quickly as it had arrived as he leans into her further. She tucks herself into him and he sighs, his breath warm and comforting and alive as it washes over the skin of her cheek, and she allows her eyes to flutter shut - allows herself to bask in the relief of finding him battered and bruised, but living and breathing and _alive._

_Alive, alive, alive - he’s alive._

“Killian,” she whispers, her voice coming out soft and heavy all at once, shaky and choked up with the weight of her unshed tears. He sways against her as she attempts to move back to look at him. Her hand makes its way into his hair and her fingers splay out, brushing against the soft and clumped up strands as her fingers rub over the expanse of his scalp.

He acknowledges her with a soft purr and a pressure against her hand as he leans up towards her touch. She can’t help but let out a watery laugh because it’s him - it’s really, really him - her idiot pirate who’d risk anything and everything to save the people he cares about, who wears colorful printed socks beneath his badass outfits of leather, who can’t help but melt under her touch when he’s given head scratches and back rubs.

At the sound of her choked up laugh he glances up at her, moving away from her and her warm touch that he wants nothing but to revel and bask in. She protests, her eyebrows furrowing and her eyes filling with worry at his movements but he hushes her, and this time it’s _his_ hand that comes up to cradle _her_ cheek, the pad of his thumb gently brushing over the dip of skin there that’s dampened with her tears.

She freezes against him and he stills. She’s scared, he can feel it in his bones - behind the weariness and exhaustion that’s seeped into his limbs into a seemingly permanent state. Suddenly, his mind is restless and his eyes dart up to meet hers.

Her eyes are wide open, unguarded and vulnerable and apprehensive, and it feels like a punch to his stomach.

 _If I had the strength to bear one,_ he thinks bitterly.

His eyes find the ground and his hand drops back to his side but then she’s there again - she’s always, always there - her touch warm and sure as her fingers grip his chin and suddenly, her gaze is on his again.

This time, he takes her in and her eyes are soft and alight with something akin to love - something so enchanting and dizzying and enamoring, that he can’t help but shudder out a breath as her expression rushes through his veins.

Her hands find the sides of his face and her thumbs sweep against his skin, careful against the cuts and bruises as she holds him to her. “I’m sorry,” she says after she’s leant her forehead against his, after one hand goes to brush against the skin of his neck as the other twines around his neck to brush through his hair, after he’s let out a sigh and slid his eyes shut out of comfort. “I was just, I wasn’t expecting -”

 _To make it in time, to find you alive_ \- he knows. They both know that it had been too close, that had it been an hour, a minute, or even a second later, this moment between them might not even exist. He knows.

“I know,” he voices, and he attempts at a smile despite the bruising and the swelling against his lips. It must come out as a grimace because her eyes fill with tears again and she chokes back a laugh, her features lighting up despite the tear that rushes down her cheek, and her mouth curves into that smile that he’s fallen in love with time and time again. She sniffs loudly and his fingers reach up to twirl her hair before he tugs - something that he had done every day when he had been by her side, something so mundane and normal and comforting that he can’t help but crave it.

He reminisces laying on the couch with her, using her lap as a pillow while she flicked through their options on Netflix as he twirled around some strands of her hair, watching as her mouth moved but taking nothing in as he focused on her and her only - her beauty and her wit and her presence - him being shaken out of his dazed reverie and her eyes filled with scolding but crinkled upwards with amusement as he realizes a second too late that he had tugged a little too hard, her mouth warm and slick against his, her smile contagious and her words without bite and muffled against his lips, “you idiot.”

For a second he thinks that she’s forgotten - forgotten that that was their thing, that they had done that over and over again, and that nothing would stop him from reliving those moments, because those moments with her are all that his tired body and heavy heart craves. But then she laughs, a real, genuine, twinkling laugh that’s laced with disbelief and amusement and then her lips are on his, warm and comforting and more than everything he’s ever wanted within those past few months, days, weeks - he doesn’t know how long it’s been and at that very moment he can’t find it in him to care because she’s kissing him. She’s kissing him and she’s bringing him back to life and setting him alight from the inside out and he’s on fire with relief.

 _Relief,_  he sighs against her lips. He’s never felt so much of it. 


End file.
